Don’t Fade…

Dear Darlings,

I was sitting in the car, watching the little kids running outside and chiding myself for not bringing something to read. Because you know, watching little kids always makes me sad. It makes me wish I was one of them, short, barefoot and makeup-paste-less. Still, it was a peaceful time. The sun was shining down on my knees, warming me all over, and I had the kind of feeling where you are half asleep and half awake. Sometimes a person just needs some space to breath, to sit in a car and be happy. To not think or bother about anything. There’s always plenty to stress about, but somehow just when I need it, I always find a perfect moment in which to clear my mind. It’s a mix of melancholy and contentment. Peace is a great feeling to have.

Last night I saw Catching Fire with my sister, finally, haha 🙂 . Poor Katniss! The story only gets worse from here on. I know, I’ve read the books. It’s going to be a heck of a ride for us. But I loved the movie. Finnick is gorgeous, as is Gale. Should I pick a team now? Ah, I’m too lazy too argue. I’ll just agree with whatever it is anybody else says. However, I could never go for Peeta. That guy is waaay too short. I’d overpower him with my gaze, forget my heels. This afternoon I told Kar. that I’m sixteen, and she said I’m too young to be wearing heels. She’s twelve. Oh, the ‘helpful’ advice of a (perhaps) jealous, wishful girl. I told her it was good for my pointe arch. Told her I take ballet. Kar. shook her head, couldn’t answer. Perhaps I should stop wearing heels whatsoever. They are majorly intimidating, I’ve heard. And seen. But I enjoy the confidence I get in strutting carefully around corners, one foot right in front of the other, like I’m on figure skates. I used to want to be a figure skater.

Have a lovely Easter!

-Lonely but Fabulous


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10 thoughts on “Don’t Fade…

  1. Nicole, dearie.
    What a fabulous & entertaining post! I’m glad you finally saw Catching Fire – I, for one, have never been a big fan of Finnick, I’m more of the Peeta or Gale type, being short. And aha, I used to want to be an ice skater too.

    • Belle,
      We have a tie on Gale, then 😉 Liam Hemsworth is absolutely stunning, in that take-my-breath-leave-me-gaping kind of way. But you’re lucky to be on the short side. And cuh-yute! I almost did it, too. But then I lay off for a few years, and now I’m in love with ballet.
      Merci pour commenting darling!
      -Lonely but Fabulous

  2. (noooo, I wrote a nice, lengthy, philosophical comment but it’s all gone now :(. I’ll try to retype it )
    The more posts I read, the more I can relate to you. I can not believe how much we have in common! I also share the same feeling while watching kids. It’s really beautiful. I feel like no matter how much I try to empathise with kids, to maybe feel reborn — to see things from their point of view, I just can’t. But maybe that’s the beauty of it. What might make this even sadder is that I barely have any memories of those simpler times.Those moments are so precious, no? I couldn’t have described peace in a better way if I tried! It really is a mix of melancholy and contentment! I think peace gets harder to find as you grow up (well, maybe note). But then again, how would we know peace if we didn’t know distress? Perhaps that’s why they’re so valuable to us now. Maybe that’s why we ( or at least I ) never remember the simplicity of our childhood. Maybe, we didn’t know peace back then because we weren’t stressed. Or maybe it’s because peace was all we knew. I don’t know. Regardless, taking in the beauty of your surroundings is never not soothing. You suddenly become aware of every chirping bird, every leaf swaying and every noise your body makes.
    *Throws confetti at you* Congratulations! I can’t believe you’ve never watched it before! I’ve read the books too, and I honestly can’t wait for the Mockingjay movie! I’m team Gale, although I’m not really on board with this whole “team” thing, so I guess it may be more accurate to say that I ship Gatniss.
    As I’m under 5′, I started wearing heels pretty early. I used to wear them regularly, but now that I’m more comfortable with my height, I keep my Louboutin stilettos tucked safely until they are needed for a fancy evening or if I’m ever in a mood to get dolled up. Although, I can’t help but pull them out every now and then. I used to own this pair of Tods platform booties and they were the most perfect thing ever. Not only did it make me the height of an almost normal person, but they were so comfortable and absolutely stunning! If I had to choose one piece to describe my aesthetic, it would be that one. Although, now that I think about it, I never really had heel-induced pains. Except for that one time. But I was wearing them for waaaaaaaaay too long. It was at my cousin’s wedding and I was one of the last guests there, so my cousins and I ended up kicking off our heels. Although I shook it off an hour or so after they did. Ironically, I get more blisters while wearing some flats than I do in heels. Also, I have a habit of walking on the tip of my toes. It drives my grandma crazy. What can I say? It’s my inner Chloe King showing through xp.
    Ha, I’m going to have to steal that comeback if anyone asks. Although no one really does, considering that everyone’s aware of my height troubles. I’ve had to ask my friends to check the top shelf of my locker on more that one occasion.
    I’ve been into figure skating every since I’ve watched that Disney movie, Go Figure, or something along those lines. Also, I went back to ballet this Saturday and headed for the beach literally right after. I was aching a bit, but it was totally worth it.

    • oh noooes! 😥 Yeah, being a kid, I can remember most of it, but the things I remember most are my peaceful moments. I agree with the whole senses thing…. it was like I was on hyper-feel, and being shorter, I felt so close to it all. Like this nature was a real world, yet a heaven… just totally different from the normal cries of my siblings. I was detached, in a wonderful, joyful way.
      *Catches confetti*! Yippee! And yes, lets ship Gatniss 😉 although once I read how badly Peeta was doing in Mockingjay, I kinda started to feel sorry for him. I just wish they had chosen a better actor for him, or something, I guess. His eyes just don’t speak to me like Gale’s do…
      Oh , I love my Louboutins! Although I think Jimmy Choos are the ones to beat all heels. && Toms are always comfy, but I prefer their flats (: Oh I always kick off my heels at weddings! Bwahaha. Even yesterday, for Easter Sunday, we were at church for at least four hours, then we went to a dinner afterwards, so I had them on for waaaay too long. I kicked them off in the car and changed into my Uggs for a bit. Hmm, heel problems 😉 I wish I was short enough to wear heels without attracting so much attention though.
      ahahha! I walk on the tips of my toes and Vlad and Jesse keep telling me it pains them just watching me. I do it too impress, like all else. Ah, me.
      Definitely steal the comeback 😉
      And gosh, the salt water always helps me so much with aching! Sounds like you had a blast. Some of my friends went over to like, the Boston ballet to get extra practice over Spring Break, but nawt me, I stayed at home and kept meself busy. Actually, plenty of people left the slopes to the skiers this particular time. I was surprised but relieved.
      -Lonely but Fab.

      • That’s very interesting. Ironically, the parts of my childhood that I remember most are the worst.
        Ahh, mine are actually Tods, not Toms. I actually don’t own a pair of Toms. *hides my face in shame*
        Ahaha, I hope you had a blast.
        *Snaps fingers sassily* If you got it, work it girl! Strut like the world is your runway.
        Salt water is the cure to everything!
        I hope you had fun.

  3. Lovely post!
    Watching kids play always make me want to play with them too. But they have so much energy I don’t know where it comes from. Like they’re always running and skipping, it’s exhausting.
    I really liked Catching Fire, and Finnick is probably my favorite! I definitely agree with you that Peeta is awkwardly short. He looks weird with Katniss in the movie. But in the books, I think Peeta’s character was endearingly sweet, and Gale just didn’t really measure.
    Looking forward to your next post!

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