I need you like a heart needs a beat.

‘Ello Darlings,

You know, a lot can happen in a weekend! Mine, (probably) unlike yours consists of Sunday, and Monday. Friday and Saturday evenings are, obviously, free, but they aren’t officially part of that. Anyways, I’ve got to tell you all about everything before I forget it, since I haven’t the energy nor the inclination to fill up precious journal pages with this. Typing is just that much more efficient when it comes to space, and speed, and etc.

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But I haven’t come here to rant about my typing skills (avg. wpm being 85, not that you want to know). I’ve much more important things to rant about. Therefore, as the whisperer would have it, “Let us begin.”

I’m holding on a rope, got me ten feet off the ground.

I’m hearing watcha say, but I just can’t make a sound.

-Apologize by One Republic.

As I’m sure you all realize, people often say things they don’t mean. Other times, they are simply so overly nervous, skittish, and generally over complimented that they can’t get a word out of their mouths. That, to be honest, was me last Friday night. You see, we were invited to a small co-ops graduation by, like, three different families. Naturally, we chose to go, especially since, as on the back of the one invite, “there will be cake.” My brothers thought that line especially catching. Personally, the reason I was slightly (kay, majorly) excited for this particular event is because AF is graduating. AF and I have shared a certain… affection… for each other since we first met when I was nine (or so). This began as hand-holding and is now… to be honest… I don’t know how to define our relationship.

What I do know is that his mom (no matter how sweet, yet very intimidating she may be) really likes me. That’s always a good sign, right? And whenever he saw my face in the crowd (standing up there in his suit and bow tie, a little to the right next to his parents and the other graduates), I just about went red, or pink, or orange, or all three. But my eyes were shining, and my smile was wide. It’s weird, to see people growing up, and knowing you will be up there too, next year. Not in the same spot, of course, but in the same position. It’s also strange to see people looking to me for affirmation, in a way. He searched my face, but in a happy way. I missed that, haven’t seen him for almost a year. He was valedictorian of the class and said a fantastic speech that had everyone laughing.

Afterwards, we went downstairs for our cake. Although it was nearly impossible to get over to him (he was being mobbed by his many fans), I spoke with his brother for a while. This kid is hilarious, and very good looking, similair to his older brother in one way, but quite different. I like the both of them, fine young men. But the second AF had a free moment, he came over to our little group, and almost immediately struck up a conversation with me.

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(From now on ommitted names in the following) Allie scootched back, Hannah looked at me and then him in feigned surprise, and Deni stood there and smiled. AF’s brother waggled his eyebrows. And what does AF do? He complimented me. Said, “You look really nice today.” I just stood there and guffawed, attempting to hide my smile and also to cough out a , you too. By then, our group had dispersed, and AF and I walked over to the water stand. He poured me some first. Gosh, what a gentleman.

So I don’t know what to think, other then, I’m flattered by his attention. It was hilarious, his cousin Diana was talking to us, and I met a few of his friends whom had come, (some of whom I had known before, others not). Before we left, she mentionted that the F guys talk about me (me? oh joy) a lot. I wonder why…. xD Anyhow, my sister Deni is convinced he is still into me. I suppose that could be. To bet honest, I feel like I don’t deserve his attention. He is so accomplished, more proficient in two instruments then I am in one. He’s graduated as top of his class, and was so busy hand-shaking all night, he barely had a free moment. I was proud, yet reminiscent, at the same time.

At the end of the night, a guy came in and asked to talk to the director. After a short whispering session, the man made an announcement. Brother stood there, waggling his eyebrows and attempting to point backwards without attracting AF’s attention. After the man was done, I looked over at AF, who was truly shocked. I’ve never felt more happy for someone, ever. He’s gotten a full, 4-year scholarship. Life is good.

Now, I will write about Saturday, but in a different post, since this one is already getting on some bit of length, and I have so much to tell.

-Lonely but Fabulous

Nicole NonChaire


3 thoughts on “I need you like a heart needs a beat.

  1. My weekends are on Friday and Saturday xD
    That “There will be cake” line is just plain awesome!
    And yes, it’s definitely a good sign if their mother likes you.
    I get what you meant about knowing that you will be in their shoes one day. Our school has a special Year 11 Leavers assembly every year. When I was in year 7, I was like, “Mehh, it’s way too soon to think about that. It’s four years away!” but this year, I was like “Asgjdfgkajsgjg that’s gonna be me in two years.” And it’s really weird, cause I’ve known these girls since forever. It’s really weird watching people grow up.
    This may sound weird, but I love speeches. I guess I just love the power a few words can carry. I think Awkward’s Jenna Hamilton said it best, ” I couldn’t believe how sexy speech could be.”
    Your grades and social status do not define who you are as a person, so don’t be afraid to approach people you respect.
    Can’t wait to hear more. Good luck

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